Tired of this shit.

Since May 13th. Two bikes accidents.
The first including a stay at the hospital and "surgery" (though they never did actually cut me open-Gratitude for that)
10 days of recovery. Remaining in the same position sleeping or awake. On my back in my bed, watching blood leave me, soaking the towels under and around me.
So, Frida-esque.
Complete recovery after 6 weeks from the accident. (I have incredible friends.)
Back on the bike within 4 weeks. It is my happiness.
Second accident. 6.5 weeks from first accident.
Slammed elbow to asphalt. Bruised nerves- causing not complete loss of feeling, but "asleep"-ness to half of my hand.
Possible fractured/chipped bone.
Bruising like a peach in heavy, late-August humidity.
I decided against returning to the hospital to know for sure,
for I can, at times, have (or make myself have) an optimistic faith in life,
but mostly because I have an empty wallet. (Fault of accident no. 1 and uninsured health).
Full recovery within 3 weeks of accident, with some minor discomfort.
Back on the bike within those weeks as well.
This week I got hit by a fast acting cold.
Throat, nasal passage, head and stomach have been invaded.
3 weeks from second accident I'm uncomfortable, nauseous and weak.
Drained of energy all day.
I mean really it is just a cold, but
I'm fucking tired of this shit.
I just want to be in control of my body again.
Completely.
It's putting me in a funk.
To feel normal again would be great.
xo.